10 Things You Should Avoid Saying To Your Wife.

10 Things You Should Avoid Saying To Your Wife.

Words are powerful and can be used to build an amazing relationship or destroy one. 

Here are 10 things you should avoid saying to your wife because women can be quite fragile and emotional. 

  “It’s up to you.”

Ladies generally don’t always like to hear this. If you are trying to come up with a plan or something, and your wife seeks your opinion regarding it, “It’s up to you” can be a very frustrating response and could even make her give attitudes for the rest of the day. Please engage in conversation with her to find a solution that works for both of you. 

“I don’t remember saying that”

Sir? Why won’t you remember? It is important to know that women are confident in their memory. Be careful how you handle this conversation or it could quickly turn into a fight. 
If you feel confident in your own memory, try something different like “the way I remember it is…” and approach it from a neutral perspective. Saying something like “I don’t remember saying that” can feel like an attack and put your wife on the defence.

“I don’t know.”

Your wife is asking what you’d like for dinner, and you saying I don’t know. Even as a daughter, it gets really annoying when I ask my dad “can I serve your food now” and he says “I don’t know” please what do you not know exactly? 

When your wife turns to you for some insight or help and you reply with “I don’t know” and keep doing what you’re doing, you leave your wife feeling alone. Instead, jump in and make some suggestions. Just say something that will benefit you both please. 

“Nothing”


The “silent treatment,” is very dangerous to any relationship at all. It creates disconnection and frustration. Instead, tell your wife you need a short time to “cool off,” and then intentionally go back to the conversation later. 

“I’ll do it later”


Please, what happened to now? Or at least why not specify when exactly. We all know that later could be next year. If you do say it, be the person who does it within a reasonable time. 

“What have you done all day?”

Personally, I feel like this is the height of it all. This is just a big no, no! Some women stay home to take care of the kids while the husband goes to work, or perhaps works from home. I beg you to please never come home and ask your wife what she’s been doing all day. Maybe the house isn’t perfect or dinner is a bit late, just don’t ask such. It can be really really annoying. 

 


“Get out!”


Okay, is there a crisis situation?, I mean, is the house on fire? did a tree fall on the house or somewhere near? Please and please, if any of these is not the case then do not order your wife out. She didn’t sign up to be bullied. No matter what the issue is, give it time to cool off. 

“You always….” or “You never…”

You don’t have to criticize her or at least find a better way of doing it. Instead of discussing all of your wife’s shortcomings, again, be constructive. Simply tell her how you feel and what you would like her to do differently. Yes, you can still do this while married. 

“It’s your fault.”

Even if it is her fault, you should find a better way of making her realize it. Assigning blame only takes you further into disagreements. It is nonconstructive. Remember, you’re a team, and you can be part of the solution. 

“You’re fat”

Such a blunt statement will never be seen as helpful but hurtful. Your wife knows it that she has put on weight and she might have already made plans to drop off a few pounds. She might be already under some pressure regarding her weight gain, and saying she is fat will only worsen matters for her. So, please be gentle.

Source: The Nation

HOW TO APOLOGIZE IN A RELATIONSHIP.

HOW TO APOLOGIZE IN A RELATIONSHIP.

Apologies are a funny thing. Everyone likes to get them. When you need to give them, things get tricky. As soon as your ego gets involved, you’re in trouble. And let’s be honest, it always gets involved. Apologizing means admitting you’re wrong, and no one likes to be wrong.

Apologies also force you to be vulnerable with your loved ones, and vulnerability is scary. It means you’re emotionally undressing yourself. You’re opening yourself up to danger (or so we think).

So when it comes to saying “sorry,” you may offer up the white flag in the most non-committal, inauthentic way possible. If you’ve ever said, “I’m sorry, okay?” you know what I’m talking about. Then there are the “I’m sorry you feel that way” non-apologies. It’s tough to say which is worse.

Apologies aren’t easy to give but they are one of the most powerful tools for communication at your disposal in any relationship. Apologies allow both parties to feel heard and expressed. They also open up a dialogue for you and your partner to come to a deeper understanding of each other’s feelings. If you get stuck on saying you’re sorry, don’t worry. You’re not alone. These are my favorite tips to get myself to a sincere apology. Hopefully, they’ll help you, too.

  • Do It In Person

That means no apology texts or voicemails. A genuine apology opens up a dialogue between you and your partner, so that means there needs to be a back and forth. Doing it in person or at least over the phone is essential. (Video works too!) Clear communication is essential in an apology. Don’t want to leave any room for misinterpretation, which can lead to more hurt feelings!

  • Timing is Everything

Apologize as soon as you know you hurt someone. The sooner you apologize the more sensitive your partner will know you are. Part of a relationship is learning your partner’s sensitivities and being in tune with them even when they don’t verbalize a specific need. A quick apology saves the buildup of contempt and shows off your thoughtfulness.

  • Dig Deep

Don’t apologize only because you know you were in the wrong. Try to empathize with the hurt your actions caused and express your understanding of this pain. Dig deep into the emotional impact of the actions you’re apologizing for. You may uncover wounds and triggers in the process. You may realize that you need to own up for a long-standing negative pattern. Ask yourself why you did the thing you did and be prepared to own up to something deeper than you expected. Being thorough in your apology shows the necessary emotional understanding that will help your relationship heal. Begin with clarity. Clarity will bring authenticity to your apology.

  • Be Vulnerable

When you’re apologizing to your loved one, remove your ego and speak from the heart. Remember⁠—it’s not about you. It’s about your partner. Don’t make excuses. State why you did what you did. Open the conversation with, I’m sorry, then speak your truth. Remind yourself that you love the person you’re owning up to. Reminding yourself of your connection. You want to fix this wrong for the someone on the other end of it. The more better your partner understands your action the easier it’ll be for them to forgive you.

  • Listen Up

More than likely your partner wants to communicate their feelings to you. Let them. This isn’t the time to justify your actions. Don’t interrupt or judge. Just listen with an open heart.

  • Give It Time

In a perfect world, our apologies would be accepted on the spot. But it doesn’t always shake out that way. That’s okay. Respect someone’s time for space. Don’t try to fix the situation so you can feel better. Let them be. In time, they’ll come back ready to forgive. If they don’t, then you know you did the best you could. You can force to fix someone’s pain nor can you force someone to forgive you. Sometimes letting go is the best choice for both.

  • Have A Plan

If and when your partner forgives you, take time to craft a plan about where you go next. How will you choose to handle similar situations in the future? What can you do to improve communication? Actions speak louder than words, so put into actions what you will do to make amends and that you’re committed to moving forward in a new way.

Apologies are difficult to give, but offering one shows strength of character, integrity, respect, a willingness to be vulnerable, and above all, love, which are all characteristics of a healthy relationship. While forgiveness is not guaranteed, if you can offer an apology from the heart, then you have a good chance of repairing your connection.

 

Source: http://funnycor.com .